No matter how bad things seem to get, somewhere else they’re bound to be worse. This lesson has been hammered home after almost a month in the People’s Republic of Oregon. True, Ohio is facing America’s third heaviest tax burden and an economy resembling 1980’s-era Eastern Europe, but it could be worse. It’s also the case that Ohio’s Republican Party was recently swept from power after the least popular governor in history led the state to almost total ruin. At least Ohio’s Republican Party had races to lose this year. Oregon’s political, economic, and social climate is very different from that of Ohio and makes me very glad to be an adopted Ohioan.

Ohio’s economy might be in trouble, but at least the state and local government (as well as large segments of the population) isn’t openly hostile to business. Schumacher Furs & Outerwear, a fixture in downtown Portland since 1895, is preparing for an “evacuation sale” after being chased away with nothing short of torches and pitchforks. The store had faced a year’s worth of protests, trespasses, vandalism, and even bomb threats from animal rights activists and eco-terrorists. In light of this, Gregg Schumacher- who says he is afraid to enter his own store- was told by the city and police to negotiate with those who would shut him down. He isn’t putting up with this, and he shouldn’t have to. Schumacher has said that he is packing up and leaving the city limits for an undisclosed location. The City of Portland’s unwillingness to defend a legitimate business peddling a legal product hardly comes as a surprise to anyone with a familiarity in eco-terrorism. Portland is well known as the Beirut of eco-terrorism, with several organizations, such as the Earth Liberation Front and Earth First!, having substantial bases of operation.

Socially Oregonians are more secular than Ohioans are religious. Oregon is second only to next-door Washington in percentage of people declaring themselves “not religious” at 24%. This is compared with 26% of French who say the same. A poll suggested that around fifteen percent of French citizens attend church regularly. A staggering twelve percent of Oregonians do the same. As you would expect, Oregon is firmly under the yoke of political correctness, “Holiday Trees” and all. Local radio talk show host Lars Larson tried to protest this with a Christmas Cross he would place in Pioneer Courthouse Square last year. This plan was abandoned when the tolerant and inclusive citizens of Portland made threats against the cross and Larson himself. At this rate Oregon will join Albania and China as the only governments in the world to declare themselves officially atheist.

Oregon is also marching down the road of becoming a one-party state. Ohio Republicans were chased out of the statewide offices last November, but at least they had races to lose. The only Republican to win a statewide race this century is Oregon’s Junior Senator Gordon Smith. Rumor has it he might not last much longer either, facing re-election in 2008. Unbelievably, Oregon- already a solid navy- is getting even bluer. The GOP lost the State Senate in 2002 and the State House in November, giving Democrats complete control of the state. Even abandoning social and economic conservatism hasn’t improved the GOP’s fortunes. Portland’s own Ron Saxton, a self-described moderate, was crushed in his bid for the Governorship last month. I believe Ohio can be saved with a little ingenuity and a few big ideas on the part of the ORP. My native Oregon, however, has been a lost cause for as long as I can remember. The state can rot in the hell their residents don’t believe in.